Some Shameless Grovelling

Hello good people. Thanks for reading.

This post- this particular post- is about a show I've written. Later I'll ask you for money, so if you're not up for this stop reading here. There will be another, non-show-related post soon, and hopefully you'll like that. Adios, and thanks.

Ok, so for the rest of you- the adventurers, the dreamers, the drop-dead beauties, the gentle people who will read my pandering and just smile knowingly- I thought I'd put up three different plots. It's your guess which one is my play, just about to be produced for the Curious Theater Branch's annual Rhinoceros Fringe Theatre Festival...

* The first is Howard!, a musical about the life and end-times of Howard Hughes. The story is told from the perspective of an E. Coli bacterium, who narrates, in song, the long wait for Howard Hugh's immune system to display any fatigue so that our E. Coli friend ("Ed," played with childlike glee by Thomas Mumphrys) and his friends, The Virusesses (sung in three-part harmony by Lakey McEvers, Julia Kylkylye, and Vanessa Williams.) While they keep their microscopic vigil, Ed pines for the lovely Streptococcal bacterium named Heaven (played with pert loveliness by Esther Fo) who lives at the end of Howard's longest strand of hair. The handsome and wicked Foster, an opportunistic microbe that causes Feline AIDS (played with a precise balance of lunacy and gravitas by Edward James Olmos,) intends to kidnap Heaven and turn her into a literal piece of shit, to be digested and then excreted by Mr. Howard. Will Ed be able to save her, and the Virusesses? Will Howard Hughes catch a cold, or will he die before Ed and the gang get a chance to proliferate? Only the music knows for sure in Howard!

*Next, I have a re-telling of the classic The Hairy Ape by Eugene O'Neill. My rendition takes in the societal changes that have become affixed to our national mind-scape and re-births them in the drama; it is done with our gender-Dystopian influences in full view as men appear as women, women appear as cultural archetypes, and apes appear as llamas. We have used the Prop Thtr space that houses the Rhino Fest to create a non-virtual three-ring whorehouse/industrial complex; this enables our audience matrix to include rotation of locale, involuntary participation, and inversion ("upside-downedness") scene experiences. "The Hairy Ape is an Oppidian Theatricals/Bad Breathe production gig, with artistic partners The Wooster Group, Larry Kaufman Inc., Blakke Bocks of the Upper Northwestern NJ Shakespeare Festival, Goodman Theatre, and The Puppet Bike (copyright 2009).

*The final offering is a short play that wants to make sense of the quiet and enervated distance between almost-dying and dying. Richard is a late-stage cancer patient who wants a burial mound built around him on his living room floor. Kari, his hired caretaker and possible friend, questions his sense and his sanity, but he has prepared: in the middle of the night, Richard had dug up a large quantity of large stones and put them in the cabinets. Kari tries to get Richard to focus on living. She'll do anything to get him shaken out of his own fatalism- but what she needs from Richard is much deeper than what her job description entails, and in her effort to fulfill both of these desires, there is a fundamental shift...


So, whaddaya think?

In all seriousness, I'm really honored to be part of the Festival. All of the people I'm working with here- folks you can read about by clicking on the link below- are fantastic: I couldn't have asked for better. Oppidian Theatricals is producing (thank God! I'm terrible at that stuff;) the cast is wonderful, the Director more so; and our crew is handsome and wily.

We, like everyone else, need your help to make this thing work. We've gotten some donations, and we're getting there- but, natch, we need more. If you can spare something, then many spiritual kisses for you; if not, kisses and a request to pass the link along to someone you know who might be interested. Please use the link below to make a donation or like us on FB, or Tweet us, or whatever your social media of choice provides:

http://rhinofest.com/shows/the_cairn.php  (once for the money,)

http://rhinofest.com/shows/the_cairn.php  (two for the show.)

By Googlin' Oppidian Theatricals you can see the website. The man in the picture is cute, don't you think?

Thanks again for being here. Next time: Explosions!!